My trip to the Wisconsin State Fair

August 4th, 2005

The trip started before sunrise. I left home and traveled to Muskegon to catch the "Lake Express", to Milwaukee.

It's a twin hulled boat that crosses Lake Michigan in about 2 1/2 hours. You would think it would make a smooth trip. But the sea was angry that day my friend. The wind on the sun deck was over 50 mph. People were hanging on to the rail to keep from falling over or being blown out to sea. I was being tossed around like chum in a bucket. I spent most of the voyage leaning over the rail, waving my breakfast goodbye!

Once ashore, I met my old Texas friend Mr. Brian "Webbs" Weber and family. We quickly headed off to the Wisconsin State Fair.

Here's Sarah and Darian just after riding the big slide. Which one is which?

One of the highlights of the fair is the Pig Racing. Four little pigs run around the track as the crowd cheers them on. Some times the little porkers run around the oval. Other times they send them through the pool of water in the middle. The little pigs all had cute pig names like Elvis Pigly, Britney Spearibs, Hamela Anderson. The pig in the number 2 gate won every race. I think the races must have been fixed!

And there off...

These pigs needed a little encouragement to jump in the water.

Another big Wisconsin State Fair tradition is the world famous, or maybe just state famous, Cream Puff.

It was quite a big operation. They were making these things on an assembly line. While you're waiting to buy one, you can see how they're made. The Wisconsin Bakers Association must sell millions of them over the course of the fair. People were sucking 'em down as fast as they could make 'em.

That's got to be at least a thousand calories right there!

Here we see Webbs and Leslie attacking their cream puffs.

Sarah vs' The Cream Puff

When it was over, wipped cream was all over her face and in her hair. I think Sarah won the fight but it was a close one. That spunky little cream puff didn't want to give up.

The Fair just wouldn't be complete without carny rides.
Here we see the Weber family enjoying an over priced rickety old roller coaster.

This is the "Big Dead Guy". It's the worlds largest inflatable anthropomorphic maze! (I bet it's the only inflatable anthropomorphic maze.) It's known as the Texas Giant.

It looks like Webbs found a new job. The Texas Giant's nose picker!

Well, the fun was over. My belly was full of Cream puffs, roasted corn, polish sausage and Wisconsin beer. It was time to get back on the boat and see how my stomach would do. Time to see if it's true. "The food at the fair, you don't buy it, you only rent it."

I swallowed some sea sick pills, drank some ginger ale and sat in middle of the sun deck. The sky was clear and the stars were shining.

Venus and Jupiter were setting in the west as I headed east across the lake.

I made it back ashore without incident. I never saw that polish sausage or cream puff again. But the roasted corn...?

©2005 John French